Here is the list of raffle prizes which will be drawn at tonight's gig at Esther MacTavish's cattle shed, at 10.15 pm after the entertainement.
1 bicycle pump
3 lady's 'very large' bras
1 can of WD40
2 cans of north Atlantic tuna
6 Slazenger tennis balls
1 masonry hammer
A copy of ‘The Art of War’ by Sun Tzu (translated into Gaelic, of course)
1 exhaust manifold for a 1961 Sunbeam Alpine
A pair of Cheviot Hoof nail clippers
3 balls of string
A bag of Golden Wonder Cheese and Onion crisps
13 oz bag of minty Pandrops
and mother will be baking the usual fruit cake
(Note to mother - I've moved the clapdarnachs from the pantry so when you're baking you won't confuse them with the raisins, like last year.)
Now, I've chist noticed that Cyril has posted the programme for the evening entertainment. Thank you Cyril. Here it is -
At last the final line up for tonights open air christmas gig. Seating strictly limited to seven. We've had one cancelation so that means theres a seated ticket available.
8.30pm: Gates open
8.40pm: Opening address by Sammy
8.41: Glenpuddle and Munroe First Crofters Memorial Brass Ensemble. Est 1862.
8.45: Farquar Bogg.
9.00: Asiatic Eskimos of Reykjavik Disco Dancers
9.03: Field cleared to allow Roderick in with his tractor
9.20: Magnus and Hugh sing "The Police"
9.23: Nellie and her five performing jack Russell Terriers.
9.28: Nellie and her Jack RussellTerrier perform - "getting in and out of a car the easy way"
9.45: Speech by Henry McKelvingrove - Knightswood - Taylor topic: "Belief in Ferrys - the mandate for Island living"
9.46: Field cleared to allow Sammy to bring the cows in for the night.
10.00: Closing Remarks: Torquil and Company
Apologies: Cyril and the Nosecones will not be performing as Derek insists that the song which begins "Starry starry night.." is a Christmas Carol and this has led to an irreconcilable split in the hamrony of the group.
Patrons are advised to seek their nearest fire exit bearing in mind that the nearest one might be behind you.
Cyril, I hope you don't mind me reprinting the programme. The rest of the boys in Reykjavik tune in to the blog every day for updates.
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2 comments:
late news....late news.....
Percy and the Plumbers have promised to do a bit tonight and will come back next week to finish it
Okay, thanks Cyril, but I'm not paying him until he's finished the last chorus and I hear some applause.
Here is a note I got from Sammy - "Tell Cyril we're worried about the allotted time for the performances. Everyone is complaining, saying that you are favouring Farquar Bogg, as he gets a full 15 minutes. Nellie says she'll have to split the first 5 minute act into one minute segments for each of the Jack Russells. Meatballs needs to go first because we all know what he does if you place him behind another dog!"
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