*FURTHER NEWS FLASH* - Reports are surfacing from the Dangly Balls Geriatric Home that old Malcolm and his ventriloquist dummy, Mabel, vanished into thin air with just 3 minutes and 21 seconds left of hygiene hour. Malcolm and Mabel were last seen entering the Hygiene Room, wearing British Airways inflatable life vests and carrying regulation size sponges.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Torquil my good friend, um... don't quite know how to ask this but is there just a teeny weeny littlest of possibilities that the Geriatric home may have hired usage a "bath house" from Wullie Spanners? Only the photo you published does look remarkably like his sheep dipping facility. My, as ever, eagle eyed paintings happened to spot wee tale tale somethings that look like clapdarnachs floating...is there a possibility that the elderly residents ran away the minuit Sponge Bath Square Bob turned round to reach for the carbolic?
Hello there my good friend Fiona and her paintings.
Well spotted! Yes, those are indeed clapdarnachs floating in the water. I've since scooped them out and dried them, ready for making into incense cones. In fact, thanks to your note we are experimenting with a new scent - carbolic and clam chowder.
Three clues have turned up since the last resident vanished -
1. We found a parachute behind the bath house. 2. A note was pinned to the door, saying, "It wasn't me!" 3. Annie's new trombone is blowing carbolic bubbles.
Hello there Torquil my friend, Wul here. Firstly, many thanks for removing the "floaters" and I'm glad you found them useful ! Secondly, that stupid woman has got it all wrong again....it's nae a sheep dipping facility.....it's a unique "Multi Role Aquatic Centre". I've removed all the snakes to the Serpentarium so its totally user friendly. I might even change the water next week, if I can find Uisdean.
Hello there again, Wullie my good friend. Now can you be explaining a bitty more about the "multi rolling". I am not quite sure how to do that. Mother says its like synchronised swimming. Is that right?
If you are looking for Uisdean, I heard he got a job as a roadie for some celtic rock band that was heading off in a van across the channel. I don’t know what they’ll do when they find he’s swapped all their amps and mixers out for tins of Swarfega. Time will tell.
Oh dear! Please don't listen to Mr Spanners...IT'S A SHEEP DIP! "Multi Role Aquatic Centre" my Aunt Agnes. We are delighted to hear that Usdean has escaped, shame the lad had to leave the country. The buzz at the knitting circle is that the old dears were overcome and became all unnecessary thanks to the combined toxins from sheep dip, clapdarnachs and carbolic!!!
Post a Comment