A severed hand, attached to a sponge, was found on the gravel driveway!
The hand, still warm, and the sponge, still soapy, are thought to belong to hygeine specialist and charge nurse, Sponge Bath Square Bob. However, to our knowledge, Sponge Bath Square Bob has not yet reported a missing hand.
When asked to quote on the mysterious dissapearances and the additional find of a severed hand, PC Hugh Dunnett would only say, "this one is a real nail biter."
3 comments:
Hello Torquil....Wul here again. Jist tae let you know; I popped into ma office, I mean the Pier Hotel Bar, about 4pm this afternoon. old Sponge Bath Square Heid was there. Now I'm nae sayin' he wis drunk cos I definately saw his drinkin' arm move more than once, but he was certainly a bitty under the weather. It just might be that he's not noticed the shortage in the arm department yet?
Hello there Wullie, my good friend. Ah, so his drinking hand must be the left one. Can you keep an ear to the outhouse door down at your office, I mean the Pier Hotel Bar? I suspect when Sponge Bath needs to "go" he might need a hand. Would you be able to assist him, Wullie, my friend, because until we get a shelf installed in there, he won't have anywhere to put down his pint glass?
Ok. no need to panic, if you dig down you'll find that the arm is not severed. Its still attached and all that has happened is he has opened the cellar skylight to wash it and all the stones have collapsed in round him a bit like quicksand, so rush to the cellar and you'll find him on top of the step ladder trying to pull his arm back in through the window. Now as for the others missing. I think they've all gone to World Dance Day International Conference in Papa Westray...
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