H.I.S.A. (Highland Island Space Authority) are seeking highly motivated individuals with aeronautical experience, to join their expanding team on the new space mission. (Details of mission to follow.)
Must have a good understanding of clapdarnach fuel and ignition systems, demonstrate ability to supervise large onboard flock of ewes, and prove experience and understanding of alien languages.
Must have own compass, binoculars, wet suit and crash helmet.
Apply below, in comments section, by November 15th, 2009.
Must have a good understanding of clapdarnach fuel and ignition systems, demonstrate ability to supervise large onboard flock of ewes, and prove experience and understanding of alien languages.
Must have own compass, binoculars, wet suit and crash helmet.
Apply below, in comments section, by November 15th, 2009.
(Photograph by kind permission of chief sheep astronaut Rudolpho Kuschelschaf.)
6 comments:
Try Woodworm Willie. He drinks huge amounts of clapdarnach rocket fuel and I heard him speaking a heap of sh*te to a flock of sheep the other night, so I'd say he was well qualified for the mission.
Big Maggie Ann
His Royal Highness Herr Doktor Prinz Rudolpho Kuschelschaf von Hessen would be delighted in helping you with your new space industry.
(There is large sums of money involved I hope?)
Ah've not got mah own compass, binoculars, wet suit and crash helmet. Them over there, eh, no, they're something else. Nothing tae do with me. No.
No no no.
Ah'm not getting in a rocket. Not again.
May my paintings and I respectfully suggest Mr William J Spanners. We know that he has a regular knowledge of Torquils clapdarnach fuel, invariably talks in an alien tongue once he has reaquainted himself with this knowledge and has shown eloquent skills when herding poor, non-islander, lambs who mistakenly stray into his garage. By now his boilersuit and hand knitted undergarments will definately be waterproof! Oh yes! We thoroughly recommend this gentleman for a job in outerspace.
Outer Space is it....I'll show yon artist wifie outer space when she gets her next service bill !!!!! and another thing, its a well kent fact that the natural patina of a true professional engineers overalls will render them waterproof after 20 years or so. Its also right obvious tae anyone wi' half a brain that on this island that its Daft Uisdean who has the greatest astronaultical aspirations.....he's even bin learnin' Klingon ! Come tae think o' it, I thought thats what he always spoke.
Wul.
I nominate Big Maggie Ann for your space mission. With the amount of Guiness and pickled eggs she consumes the woman could f#rt her way to Pluto. Anyway, no alien would mess wi oor Maggie. We know she has her own binoculars cuz she has them trained on Cyril Nosecone all the time but you'll need a gigantic measuring tape to fit her oot wi a wetsuit.
anon
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