Tuesday, November 07, 2006

The (Highland Island) Bachelor

Lovely Day Radio will soon be featuring the Highland Island's version of The Bachelor. Although we are still deciding on the identity of The Bachelor for our show, we have chosen twelve outstanding ladies that will be competing to win the affections of our lucky man.

Each week we shall have The Special Brew Ceremony where The Bachelor will give a tin of Carlsberg Special Brew to the ladies that he wishes to get to know better. The ladies without tins of Carlsberg Special Brew will be eliminated, until only one lady remains.

No expense will be spared to enable The Bachelor and his suitors to venture out on exotic dates. So keep watching for details of these exciting locations.

At the end of the show, The Bachelor will be presented with his own croft here on the island, where it is hoped that he and his chosen lady will live out their years together.

Regarding The Bachelor, we are still trying to decide between Hamish the Bearded Clam Diver, Crawford Minty, or Woodworm Willie. Cyril and I have far too many commitments with Daft Uisdean.

So, as Hamish is still recovering from his sea rescue in northern Africa, and Woodworm Willie will be busy with his night classes, we were wondering if Crawford Minty would care to participate in our programme and be The Bachelor.

Can you please sign your name in the comments box below, Crawford, if you are willing to be The Bachelor here on The Highland Island Reality Show, and then I'll send you all the necessary paperwork?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello Torquil, Bunty Minty - Crawford's mum, here.Crawford's been away on business with PC Hugh Dunnett on the mainland since our missing antique furniture turned up in the Crime Detection van. However I'll nominate him in his absence as bachelor for your contest, its high time he settled down- he's already 74.

Torquil Mor said...

Oh now that’s just smashing Bunty. Thank you very much. Aye my mother, Dorcas, is so very fond of your sherry trifle recipe but I’m telling her to be putting in a bitty less sherry because it gets her bladder over excited, especially on Tuesdays because we have to wait a whole week until washing day comes round again.

Now Bunty, I’m wondering if either you or Crawford could be writing to me at the blog email address, that’s highlandisland@verizon.net We’re needing some background information on Crawford so that we can be compiling his biography. Don’t be worrying about typing it up all pretty now Bunty because we understand about the cataracts. We can be editing or censoring it here (not that we'd ever embelish, or anything.) We’re just needing to know as much about Crawford as you can tell us. Things like a description of his physical appearance, occupation, maybe a wee story or two about him growing up, his favorite pass-times, his inside leg measurement, whether or not he rolls the tops of his wellies down to stop chaffing, his favorite aftershave, his last will and testimony, and that sort of thing – anything that comes to mind, Bunty dear.

While you are doing that, I’ll be getting Hamish the Bearded Clam Diver to hurry up and send me the file containing pictures of all the lovely ladies, so that we can be putting them up on the web site here.

Thank you now Bunty. (Good luck with your implants by the way. Hope it perks you up a bit, and takes the stress off your knees.)